Week 1....LIVE WEIGH IN!!!
Jan 8, 2020
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TfGHVzdUYCw

hey everybody welcome back to my channel
and if you're new welcome to my channel
if you haven't subscribed please push
the little subscribe button down below
with a little notification about that
you get notified every time that I
upload and when I go live I want to
first say welcome to Wednesday it has
been a long week for me it really has
and I am happy to say that I have made
it to Wednesday and I am still breathing
I am still alive and I am hanging in
there but by the hair I'm just gonna say
by the hair I'm still sticking around I
packed my bags a few times this week and
just wanted to disappear but well that
ain't gonna happen so I might as well
stick around and face it all so there's
a few things that I want to talk about
and again I hate when I start my videos
like this because I feel like there's
people that are like oh god here we go
again here's the drama here's you know
the preaching here's this here's that
and I don't want to come off as that
type of a person I really don't of
course I need to say things that you
know I just I need to address and so
there's a few things I just made a
little bit of a list today so I don't
forget anything as there's a few really
important things that we need to talk
about plus we're gonna get into what I
ate yesterday and then also at the very
end of my video we will have a live
weigh-in so anyways what I needed to go
ahead and address and bring up is
yesterday on my video I was talking
about a youtuber his name is Zachary
Michael I did not mention his name
because I you know I I guess that's kind
of a passive-aggressive type thing which
you know it's it is what it is and you
know however if anybody wants to deal
with that situation but anyways I was
talking about Zachary Michael yesterday
on my channel saying that you know he
calling me a racist and things like that
I want to first be the one to publicly
apologize to Zack and say I am sorry for
multiple things one being that I accused
you of being the one to call me a racist
when I went back and I looked at the
comments again in your thread on Twitter
I realized that it was under your name
so it was not you it was somebody else
right under you but it looked like it
was kind of in yours like it looked like
it was in your comments sorry but in
reality it really wasn't it was somebody
else had said it and then you just cut
commented back on it so it wasn't
technically you that said I was a racist
another thing is is I don't want to ever
come across as being someone that is not
being sensible to cultures languages
religions and other things like I don't
want to come off as one of those type of
people that have issues with that or
that I'm poking fun at anything of those
natures and I want to also be the first
to apologize and say I am sorry if I
offended anybody that said those words
to anybody that heard them I did not
mean them to come across that way but I
will say I am very sorry because now I
realize what I said did cause hurt and
you know and different feelings from
what I said I definitely also lumped
everybody into a group when I said Asia
and as it was brought to my attention by
Zack that you know Asia has put up with
a whole bunch of different you know
different things that it Asia is not
just one direct country or you know
whatever so I just want to say I am
deeply sorry again if I offended anybody
I definitely want to say that I am sorry
to Zachary's boyfriend No
I apologize I again did not mean it to
come across the way that it sounded but
I take full responsibility for that and
I just want to say that I am sorry and I
just want to make it clear that I will
be very cautious from here on out when I
make statements that I run through my
brain before I say them if it's gonna be
something that would be offensive
because I understand that certain words
can be offensive and you know I've had
my children called names before I've had
my husband you know called names before
because of his you know country where
he's from and I do understand how it
hurts and so even though like I said it
was innocent I didn't think about it
being anything wrong but when it was
brought to my attention that hey that's
not right I got defensive and I you know
of course started saying no no no it's
not what I meant which it wasn't but at
the same time I should have stopped to
see what Zach was saying so I could
understand more clearly that I was in
the wrong so I apologize Zach I did not
mean to say that in a way that would
have caused any type of upsetness or you
know anything like that so I just want
to apologize next I want to talk about
the collab so I kind of talked about
this a couple days ago how the whole
Club came together with the fact that
Jenna was the one that approached me and
asked me if I wanted to do the club and
I was very excited to do it because you
know I was like well hey what's you know
why not you know I mean working with
somebody and having somebody by your
side to support you and encourage you
gives you that much more um to continue
to do it but you know I I know that
there's been changes all over the place
and I guess that's part of you could say
kind of that's part of life you know
things are gonna change not everything's
gonna be set in stone I mean we didn't
sign documents or you know we didn't
sign contracts that this is the way it's
gonna be so I mean things can
change and they have you know so Jen had
posted a video today kind of explaining
on her side what was going on so I just
think it's only fair that I come on my
side and explain so that the viewers
that might not be on her channel will
kind of get what's going on so Jen
decided to collab with another youtuber
that also does keto and can hold her
more accountable to the diet that she's
chosen to take on and I totally respect
that a hundred percent I get it you know
I mean it's it's a it's a bummer that we
couldn't continue to do the
collaboration or the challenge whatever
you want to call it but it is what it is
and it's alright I'm totally okay with
that but you know at the end of the day
this is for me anyways and I really want
to just stay focused on what I am doing
which is working on myself I want this
change so bad and I desire this change
so bad that I will do anything to match
my goal that I am trying to get to so
for me it doesn't matter if I'm gonna
have somebody doing a challenge with me
or collaborating with me or anything at
the end of the day I need to do this for
myself and for myself only and of course
I'm putting it on YouTube to help others
see that it's possible we can do this
but I'm not going to take my focus off
of the game which is me and my health
and so as that stands for now I am out
of the challenge I am out of the
collaboration due to the fact that she
is wanting to go over to keto and do her
keto diet which is fine I
preferably don't want to do keto I think
that for me what I'm doing is working
for me and I'm happy with what I'm doing
so I choose to stay with what I'm doing
no harsh feelings towards people that do
keto like that's not even what I'm
trying to say but I just personally know
that I don't think that's something
that's sustainable for me but without
all being said I still I'm going to be
working very
on myself and this isn't this this this
whole process of my weight-loss journey
isn't just gonna end because that ended
so I just want to make that very clear
that I'm still going on with what I'm
doing she's just gonna do her own thing
I'm just gonna do my own thing and just
forget the whole challenge and CLAB I
think that really kind of got not messy
in a bad way but just I think it just
kind of everything just kind of got off
on the wrong foot
and I think that I was kind of missing
the vision I was missing what I was
supposed to be focusing on rather than
focusing on my weight loss my health I
was starting to focus too much on this
challenge and what was in title and all
that stuff I just I need to focus on me
so that is what I'm going to do is focus
on me
so anyways there's that for my food I
have been feeling so good with the
choices that I have been making with my
food options I have not subjected
subtracted anything from my diet I am
eating everything that I want but I eat
it all in moderation and that's been the
biggest key for me this week is really
watching my my my portions instead of
having the portions that I would
normally have I have cut those in half
and even sometimes from 1/2 to half of
that depending on what it is rather than
going in and having Pringles or
something else for a snack I'm having
some almonds
I'm definitely downing my water better
than I have for a very long time and the
no soda has still stuck
let's see now that I'm starting to feel
so much better I feel like I'm getting
my taste buds back so I'm being able to
taste a little bit more which helps you
know when you can taste your food and
get a you know get an idea of what
you're really liking so like last night
I made the fish and vegetables but I
made rice on the side but not for me I
did not have the rice I saved the right
for the family and I just ate my my
steamed vegetable excuse me my steamed
vegetables and my fish and I didn't even
eat all of the fish I actually ended up
giving the kids one of my filleted fish
and I gave s for a half of my vegetables
so I didn't even eat even what portion I
served for myself so anyways I hope you
guys are all having a wonderful day I'm
gonna close so I can get my food updated
here at the very end you will see my way
in and then I will see you guys tomorrow
bye bye so this is pretty
self-explanatory I'm using up this
instant oatmeal before I go and purchase
anything more but these are 130 calories
per package I only had one package it
was enough to fill me up and make me
feel good also there is my water I've
already started drinking and I have
gotten in quite a bit of water within
the last few days for a snack instead of
grabbing for popcorn or chips or
anything like that I actually grabbed 25
non salted almonds and it was a perfect
snack for me so this is something that I
like to make with chicken breasts so you
cook the chicken breasts and then you
shred it up you would mix the chili with
the embosser sauce it's a chili sauce
and then you mix it all together really
really good and you can put it like on a
tortilla or something of that matter I
just put it on my chicken and then I
just eat it like that but it is a very
good mill and honestly it's very low in
calories here is my fish cooking it
looks so good I can't wait for it to get
done
and here it is steamed vegetables and
tilapia fish it was so good and very
filling
so last week I weighed in at 475 pounds
this week I've weighed in at 460 pounds
that is a 15 pound weight loss this week